So I might be a masochist.
Boyfriend and I talked some more yesterday afternoon while we watched Puppy play in the dog park. He agreed that French Dude has been disrespectful to both of us. By picking fights and disrespecting me, he’s disrespecting Boyfriend and the whole house and has been more trouble than he’s worth. So he agreed to back me 100%. When we got home, he talked to French Dude alone (and said some pretty awesome stuff, I eavesdropped. I COULDN’T HELP IT!) and French Dude begged for another chance to apologize to me.
I laid it all out, told him I have no more patience. He gave me empty apologies, I called him on them because I have heard them before. I told him I know he thinks he’s blameless, but the fact is HE has created this WHOLE problem. And HE has been doing irresponsible and inconsiderate things for months with zero regard for any consequence.
He kept trying to bargain, talking about us needing to give him 30 days. I told him, I know more about the rental laws than you do, you get squat. He kept asking how much time? How much time? I said “you should have been OUT of here already. Instead, you sat around, smoking and painting all day. You have no concept of how serious a situation you have created. ” I told him “I gave you carte blanche after EVERY incident. You learned nothing. You went RIGHT back to your behaviors, even getting worse. I have no sympathy left for you. I’ve turned it off”.
I also told French Dude that whatever shred of respect I had for him as a human being was completely demolished when I heard what he had done with his “fat girlfriend”. That he disgusts me and how dare he treat anyone like that, especially in MY house on MY bed (my old bed is in the guestroom). He tried to say he has feelings for her, I shut him up and called bullshit.
At the end, I looked at Chef Boyfriend and said, I’m sorry. I know you don’t want to be a dick, but I cannot take it anymore. This was supposed to be an easy summer and it’s been awful.” So Boyfriend looked at French Dude and said, “OK. You heard it.”
I left the patio, got in the shower and started to cry. Because I’m just emotionally wrecked. Boyfriend came in and got in with me (which is rare because he’s so tall and I’m so short, mutual showers are kind of a comedy routine) and lightly chastised me for crying. Saying I did what was right and that he supports me 100%.
In the shower. I looked at Chef Boyfriend and said “should I let him stay?” He said “the week? That’s fair” and I sighed and said, “No. The duration. It’s not HIS money he’d be spending, it’s his grandmother’s and mother’s money. It’s not fair to THEM.” He told me he’d support me no matter what, he also told me how I handled myself during the discussion was sexy which made me laugh and question his sanity. Then he told me to make French Dude sweat and stress about it as long as possible.
I waited 15 minutes or so. Enough to let him really worry, then knocked on his door. He came out and I said “God help me, do NOT make me regret this. But you can stay until the end of August” French Dude looked like I’d just saved his life. He kept thanking me profusely. I told him “I’m not doing this for you. Don’t thank me. Thank your mother and your grandmother. THEY don’t deserve to have to spend even more of their loan money on you because you can’t get a grip.” He looked like he had JUST realized that was what he was doing, abusing THEIR funds. That his behavior reflected on them. After he kept thanking me and I kept telling him “don’t. If something happens, there will be NO discussion. You’ll pack your things and hand over your key and you’ll leave. End of. ” He “promised” this and that. I told him “You don’t have to impress me or make new rules, you just have to be a considerate human being!”
Then Boyfriend did the sexiest thing. He looked at French Dude all serious and said, “Look, I could give a shit about possessions. Don’t break stuff, obviously. But if you hurt my girlfriend or my dog? I’ll hunt you down in whatever country you’re in, cut off your balls and make you eat them.” He kinda softened it with a chuckle, but the two of them had a moment where the seriousness came through.
I couldn’t help but roll my eyes, it was such a protective and sexist thing to do; but I can appreciate him doing it in front of me. Making it abundantly clear that French Dude is not to mess with me, or Puppy in any vindictive attempt at retaliation.
So yeah. We’ll see how it goes. But now French Dude knows, unequivocally, Boyfriend and I are on the same side and he’d better shape up or get out.