There will be spiders

In my bed. 

Boyfriend locked himself out of the house this morning. He left his keys on the bed last night, so being the thoughtful Girlfriend I am, I set them on his nightstand before I went to sleep. 

He fell asleep on the couch and didn’t come to bed until 430am, which sucked for me because it meant I slept lousy and he probably has a crick in his neck. I tried to get up and wake him to go to bed, but I couldn’t muster the strength, so I passed back out.

He texted me that he’d locked himself out and had to crawl through the window to get in. The only window he could mean is our bedroom window. I asked if he put the screen back, he said “I tried”. I don’t like that one bit. He then said “I’ll fix it when I get home”, well that won’t happen because I’ll be getting home first. My biggest concern? Is the window open right now? He hasn’t answered me.

There’s going to be spiders in my bed when I get home. I just feel it. And ants. AND PROBABLY A RANDOM CAT OR OPOSSUM!! I’m going to have Nature in my bed and there’s nothing I can do to prevent it for another 6 hours.

6 HOURS!! The wildlife could have infiltrated, colonized, and started developing a system of government by the time I get home! And poor Puppy, she’s too sweet and stupid to be elected to the new Insecta-Parliament! I really hope she’s dozing blissfully on the couch in the living room, unaware of the impending Bug World in my bed.

 

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